Feathers Pilosophy

While if you have not already learned this unfortunate bit of information: SPD is not considered to be a “stand alone” diagnosis, and thus treatment is not something recognized by insurance companies as a condition. Therefore, they do not pay for treatment. However, those specialists who have been treating it have developed some very clever means of billing for treatment with a potential combination of other things that are commonly present as symptoms inherent to this disorder. 

This is an individualistic capitalistic society. Typically, this type of information would be in some type of format requiring a subscription, membership, etc. I prefer not to do that. This is my personal choice, good, bad or indifferent.  Absolutely none of these techniques or viewpoints I discuss as things that I found to be particularly useful in my own life, are new concepts. They’ve been written and rewritten and repackaged and rebranded since Sophocles. This leads me to the belief that it isn’t the information that is flawed, or all of those things I just mentioned would not be as popular as they are. I am not saying I am right, but I have a strong suspicion of why those various forms may be less effective is due at least in part, to the manner in which the information is presented. But I’m still testing that hypothesis. So, in a way, this is a bit of an experiment, although I am not actually collecting data, which does on occasion bias the results. This is just a place where a wide variety of information is offered. What anyone reading any portion of this may choose to do with this information, which includes “not read any of it”, is entirely their choice.  Unless someone has the desire to share their individual experiences with me, I have no idea how each individual perceives the content (whether it was in any way useful, a giant waste of your time, Feather needs to get out more…all may be entirely valid). This format allows me to have no expectations, no emotional ties to any of these ideas, or any individual’s opinion of them. Which suits me just fine. It’s open-source information. 

Given that if the vast majority of these concepts were traced back to their original creator (which is almost virtually impossible) nothing I will discuss is the singular intellectual property of a specific individual, professional field, academic field, and is essentially, available elsewhere (in the most unlikely of places commonly). However, if there is a particular book/specific author or I am able to provide something more concrete, I will include those references with links should anyone want to explore any one of those particular topics further.  

Along with discussing SPD and various assorted topics, I also include small things I have learned over the course of both education (formal and informal, I have always been an avid reader, and I have a wide range of things I find interesting. I am a self-proclaimed, card-carrying nerd. I embrace it, I own it, it has served me well). Absolutely nothing that I discuss is not readily available in some form or fashion somewhere else. None of these are things that have not previously been written and discussed, repackaged, renamed, written and discussed ad nauseum. Which is why there may be specific terms for some things such as “radical acceptance” but before psychology claimed that, it was and still is a fundamental practice of Buddhism. So, I typically do not (likely because I don’t know the original primary source) include the source, because regardless of where I came across it, odds are very good it wasn’t from the first human who ever discussed it. Again, I vow for full transparency. I absolutely can tell the stories of the goofy things that I have done because of SPD (some are not, and I won’t even attempt to blame them on that). 

I will also provide you with some excellent resources that are specifically SPD related, but when I list what I have decided to call “Feather’s Fun Facts”, more often than I honestly do not remember where I learned it. I also want to say that I put those in there because: a) Giant nerd, proud of it. Love learning. I no longer associate it with school, and depending upon how traumatic or how wonderful your educational experience was, I encourage you not to as well. I can tell you that prior to college, I don’t really recall having strong feelings towards or against school until I was around 12 (with the exception of gym class), where I hated it with a ferocious all-consuming passion. Given that my bio parents were both teachers and very authoritarian in their parenting style, not only was school not ever considered optional, and any particular feelings I had on the subject were irrelevant, but perfect attendance was expected as were near perfect grades. However, I hated it more because of the social context than anything. I was bullied (not really because of my SPD, I think there were a lot of other factors that outweighed those differences that were not as noticeable as many SPD symptoms can be for other people). I will say that my SPD was likely not helpful for making me find anything remotely pleasurable about any type of team sport. I have both spatial issues and some coordination issues, add to that the fact that I am left-handed. So, soccer and kick ball were big enough challenges, but put anything involving a high-speed object whizzing at my head that I am supposed to make contact with accurately and quickly with any type of bat/racquet or paddle…forget it. I got used to being picked last every single gym class, and if we were doing softball, I loved being placed in the far outfield away from any likely possibility of having to do anything, so I took that as an opportunity to sit in the grass and look for play with any cool bugs. I enjoy swimming, but the hatred for public locker rooms and showers made that equally as horrific for me. 

Ironically, I actually wound up finding my own niche in the athletic world, which is as an equestrian. I started my early days as a jumper, now the complexity of dressage is my passion. Which I partake of as frequently as possible, and I will talk more about horses again, potentially to the point where you have my permission to say “Can you please use ANY other example? Enough with the horses already!”  This particular tangent is to say that I ultimately found something that I love, that brings me great joy, that I wanted to master (which, as far as dressage is concerned, nowhere close, but it is considered to be a lifetime learning curve for most, particularly if you weren’t privileged enough to have been raised by an Olympian in that discipline and essentially started riding before you could talk) badly enough to persevere despite some challenges.  I can honestly say that when I was in high school I never would have imagined that I would be riding at the level I am, or doing a lot of the things I do with horses daily, and that is one of the most beautiful and wonderful things about life…you just never know. Having said that, I learned that in order to grab onto certain dreams, you have to be willing to take risks, and you have to stop fearing the unknown which tends to inhibit change. Both are terrifying beyond terrifying the first time, but they get easier each and every time.

I am a firm believer that absolutely anything and everything can be a teachable moment. Teachable moments should always be as fun as possible, sometimes even so fun that it becomes metaphorically like hiding the veggies in something really delicious, and all the kids know is “this is great” but I know that there’s actually something nutritious that I might not otherwise get my finicky eater to not just eat, but enjoy. Same applies to teaching something that would initially and frequently be met with a great big wall of resistance. It often is not inherently obvious that it’s a learning opportunity.

If I were to give you a few commonly known phrases that ultimately have served as the foundation for who I have become and keep me focused on my goals even when the inevitable obstacles arise, they would be: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Be the change you want to see in the world. Practice random acts of kindness. What does not kill you makes you stronger. We may not always get what we believe we want, but we always get exactly what we need. Actions more often than not speak louder than words. 

Lead by example. Practice what you preach. Perspective is in fact everything.